Forgiveness

(Matthew 6:14-15) 14 For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. 

 
Forgiveness is a hard thing to do especially when you have been so hurt by someone's words or actions.  Often times, people do or say things to us either knowingly or unknowingly which leaves us with a "sour taste in our mouths" (so to speak) about that (those) individuals.  Sometimes the only defense mechanism is to be angry at that person all the time when they're in our presence and sometimes not.  These feelings are common amongst the human race even those people who are holier than thou feel these feelings as well.

I am currently working through this issue myself.  Believe me, it is a hard task that but it is something that is totally doable.  Talking about your feelings, writing your feelings down, crying are just a few ways of airing your feelings.  It is NOT okay to keep them bottled inside because doing that only; keeps you angry, makes you sick emotionally and physically, and keeps in stuck!  

What led me to this conclusion that you have to move on and stop being stuck on what someone has said or done was my seven year old daughter.  There were a couple of instances where I realized, this little girl is so much better than me.  The first instance was when her friends from gymnastics and her weren't getting along, they were being mean to her for some reason and she was being mean back (natural instinct) she cried about it, talked to me about it, and the next day when she went to gym, she told the girls' parents about it and how it made her feel.  Not only did she do that, she told them how she felt and forgave them.  Since that period they have gone back to being friends.  I guarantee she hasn't forgotten about it but she knows how to deal with the situation if it arises again and has moved on and put the little girls' behavior in the past.  

Another incident of her being "the bigger person" and forgiving happened after I spanked her for her wrong behavior.  Literally minutes after being spanked, I was still angry with her and she had come into my room and told me that she loved me and was sorry for what she had done.  I told her that I apologized for having to spank her but she had disappointed me.  She proceeded to tell me that she knew she was wrong and that she had forgiven me for doing what I had done and she hoped that I had forgiven her for doing what she had done.  I was blown away by such a grown up gesture that most grown ups don't display.  

From that point on, I decided, if a seven year old can do it with God's grace I sure could take a page from her book and do the same thing!  Yes, it is hard to do but it is doable.  We all as parents hope we are doing right when we raise our young and teaching them the correct way to behave.  Somewhere in the seven years that my child has been on this earth, we (my husband and I) and hopefully our inner circle has taught her right and this pleases me.

It only seems that NOT forgiving should be the thing to do, but the bible teaches us if we forgive, our Father in heaven will forgive us.  But if we choose to keep hate in our hearts and NOT forgive, He will not forgive us.  The enemy wants us to continue to feel hurt and continue to not forgive because it hurts our Father.  Let's not displease Him because it only hurts us in the end.  

Furthermore, the person that was unjust to you may not even know you're angry with them and could care less that you are.  Moreover, you may add fuel to the fire by being angry with them.  This is where peace comes in...read and study your bible, go to God in prayer, ignore ignorance, keep your mind free and clear of things, and remember you can only control yourself and your actions.  People will ONLY do things that you allow them to do to you.

With that being said, live for you and not for others.  Take a step back and look at the bigger picture.  Take a page from the seven year old's book and forgive others wrong doings.  You don't have to deal with them but you do have to forgive in order to be one step closer to the kingdom of Heaven!